Christmas 2018

                                                                 Emma and Herbie- 2018
                                                                       Killerton House 2017
                                                                    Killerton House 2018
                                                                                  2018
                                             Lighting a candle- remembering Elizabeth
Christmas 2018
Missing Elizabeth like mad.   Over the last couple of months we have raised lots of money for Biff's Battle and have started to make plans for next year.  A coffee morning and cake sale after school and also  hoping to camp outside Tesco, Seaton for a morning.
Over the last month I have had Elizabeth's medical notes sent through and imaging.  It seems like a distant memory, almost like it wasn't us.  Maybe it is our brains way of being able to function.  There have been times when I have thought about it all and I start to question some of my decisions, especially at the time of relapse.....should we have explored the clinical trials?  I know it wont change anything now but I think my brain was on slow mode during the first couple of weeks of being in the hospice.

 The children are very excited about Christmas and Lucy especially has asked to take a few things up to the grave for Elizabeth.  They also wanted to put tinsel up there.  It is lovely that she has had so many visitors.  It looks full of love up there.  It will be good to keep busy on the day and then I look forward to some time to chill and rest the week after.  We can then start to focus on celebrating Elizabeth's birthday on the 3rd January.

 I know Christmas day wont feel like the same but like lots of people have mentioned, we need to still make some lovely memories for the other children and hopefully Elizabeth will be watching over us and will be part of the fun.  Just wish so much that I could give her a cuddle and spoil her rotton!  This Christmas would have been her second but her first without all the sickness and NG tube feeds.  

 So grateful we knew such a wonderful girl who was so chilled and happy.

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