September 2018




September 2018



What a busy month! We hit the 5-month anniversary a few days ago.  Certainly, doesn’t get any easier.  I wonder if she would be walking now? I think she would be crawling.  Back to work keeps me busy for a couple of days and then the remaining week is taken up with a few charity bits, housework and a day to spend with Johnny!

We also have had a visit from the hospice nurses which was lovely.  We could show them what we had been up to over the last few months and book in a stay at the hospice to revisit, plus a remembering day which we are very much looking forward to.  It is my main aim to keep talking about Elizabeth and keep her memory alive.

Ella also turned 9, I can’t believe where the time is going!  I could tell she loved her family party, but I also knew she was missing Elizabeth that day.  She never says much but you can tell it is hard, we feel it too and love a family get together but there will always be someone missing now.

September has also meant back to preschool and Johnny is struggling with separating from me to go in. I never like to use the last year as an excuse, but I wonder what is going on in his head.  Does he wonder if I will have to disappear somewhere while he is there and won’t be there when he gets home? I am hoping the consistency of each week will help and he will start to go in each morning happy.

I also need to work on my memory. I know I forget things, I spend so much time thinking about Elizabeth still need to make room for everything else!  At least unlike August we have had no more funerals and I have not been so unwell (August saw me very poorly with strep A).  Maybe this is our new normal …everything is starting to settle.

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